Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me.  Psalm 51:10

I remember, prior to being a follower of Christ and at various times of my life, watching sermons on television (typically on Sunday mornings). Several evangelists would say, at the end of the sermon, if you don’t know Jesus as your personal Lord and Savior, pray this prayer… they would then pray a prayer that I have come to know as the “sinner’s prayer”. It basically says, God I know that I am a sinner and I know that I have not lived a life that is pleasing to you and I repent of my sins and ask your forgiveness Lord come into my heart and abide there. I pray this prayer in Jesus name amen. That is an abbreviated and paraphrased version, but you get the idea.

Typically when I got to this part of the show, I would pray that prayer. I prayed it every time I watched these sermons, I prayed it every time I got into any real trouble and I prayed it whenever I felt like I had reached the very end.

But, no miraculous changes ever took place after I prayed this prayer. No sunbeams from heaven, no doves flying down, no voice of God from Heaven saying I forgive you, not even a glimpse of peace.

I knew that this meant that I was too bad for God to forgive. After all, there was usually someone who would speak during these sermons about the miracle change that took place when they prayed this prayer and how God had forgiven them and changed their lives, but for me…..nothing.

Like the thief on the cross, who chastises the other thief for mocking Jesus (And we indeed are suffering justly, for we are receiving what we deserve for our deeds; but this man has done nothing wrong Luke 23:41) I accepted that there was a penalty for my sins and that I was going to suffer the consequences for them.

But, my children were still young, they didn’t have to and so we searched, and searched, and searched for a church. And when we found one that we actually experienced the love of Christ in, we stayed. I’ve talked about it before, but that congregation loved on us the moment we walked in and one by one, my children began to have a relationship with Jesus Christ.

And, on the Sunday that I expected our oldest daughter to pray to receive Christ, I (for the first time ever) realized that I wasn’t too bad and that God still wanted a relationship with me. The Pastor said “if you think you are too bad for God to forgive, if you think you have to clean yourself up before you come to Him, He is calling to you right now, He is reaching out His hand to you and offering you the free gift of salvation, you just have to accept.” I’ll never forget those words, because through them God said I do want a relationship with you, I do want to forgive you, I do want to spend eternity with you and I do love you. I moved as quickly as I knew how down to the front of that church (because we did alter calls at that church, where you would go down and the pastor and congregation would pray with and for you) and I prayed with all my heart that God would forgive me. I prayed that if there was any good thing in me He would use it and that I would go where He sent me, do what He told me and I would live my life for Him.

Guess what…no sunbeam, no dove and no voice from heaven. But I did received the free gift of salvation that day, I received the forgiveness of my Heavenly Father, I experienced His love, felt a peace I have never known and ….I have been trying to live my life for Him every day since.

The issue wasn’t that I had to be in the church to pray that prayer, I wasn’t saying the words of the prayer wrong, I had a heart condition, my heart was hard. I wasn’t praying that prayer from my heart. I wasn’t sold out for God, I wasn’t saying “I am yours God”, I was saying “Hey God wave a magic wand and make my life better, will ya?”. God desires that we would love Him and be devoted to Him, because He loves and is devoted to us.

After all, “For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him will not perish but have ever lasting life.” John 3:16

He promises that we will find Him when we seek Him will all of our heart (You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart. Jeremiah 29:13).

Now, has my walk been perfect? NO. There have been times when I have felt far from God because I had unforgiveness or some other unconfessed sin come between He and I or I have gotten more focused on the world and less on Him. But guess what He says about that….You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart. Jeremiah 29:13, simply praying a prayer of repentance and a desire for a renewed relationship with Him, FROM THE HEART, and we are right back where we belong, in the arms of Jesus.

God desires a close and intimate relationship with us, whether we have been walking with Him for many years or our heart is just beginning to soften. Everyone of us can be praying a prayer, from the heart, asking Him to forgive us, to draw us closer to Himself than ever before, to renew our faith and grow it deeper, to revive our spirits and create a greater hunger for Him and for His word.

I pray that we would all pray, with sincere hearts, that God would forgive us and grow us deeper in our faith and relationship with Him. That He would create in us a desire to spend more intimate time with Him and that we would have a greater desire to glorify Him and share Him with others. These are all God’s will for our lives and He says that we have not because we ask not, so ask!

If you have prayed that prayer like I have and felt like you were too bad or that God didn’t want a relationship with you either, I assure you that it was simply a heart condition. Even if you have never prayed that prayer, but do not know Jesus Christ as your personal Lord and Savior and you do desire this kind of relationship with Him, I pray that you would go to our Life Preserver page (https://forgiven-n-loved.com/life-preserver/) right now and pray the prayer that is outlined there. Pray that prayer with all of your heart. He does love you, He does desire a relationship with you and He does want to forgive you and rescue you from the consequences of your sin.

Once you have prayed that prayer, please reach out to me at admin@Forgiven-N-Loved.com and let me know. I’d love to be in prayer for you.

Luv ya!